"Kick it around, beat it around, go celebrate with yo people."
"Jozy loves scoring like a fat kid loves eating cake."
"AAAAHHHH... AAAAAAAAAHHHH CLINT DEMPSEEEEY!! WOWWOWWEEWAA!!!"
If I'm not mistaken, that last goal is somehow a tribute to Borat. Veeerrryyy niiice... pause, not. I do enjoy the excitement of soccer announcers around the world, but this fella screaming like a madman just for the sake of screaming like a madman isn't one of those examples. AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!! Sorry, just had to get that out.
I'm counting on our intrepid AA readers to do some investigative reporting and find out what in the world it is we just watched and whether or not it's actually real, or a fake. (I really do hope it's real.) Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm at a conference and I have to run into the auditorium screaming WOW WOW WEE WAAAAA...
Thanks to @EricHGuthrie for tweeting us the clip!
***Update: Thanks to @fbihop on Twitter and timmyintransit below in the comments for saying it's the commentary from the CONCACAF website. Evidently, there have been some issues with CONCACAF's commentary before. Perhaps there is no money to pay real announcers because all of it has been used already in bribes and corruption.