We've chronicled Tony Kornheiser's goofy exploits on PTI in the past. From quoting The Wire, singing Rebecca Black, being baffled by HAM, and attempting to tickle Wilbon, Kornheiser has the unique ability to entertain by bravely commenting on pop culture despite being a bit removed from the youthful demographics from which many of these references are proliferated. In a nutshell, he's your old, embarrassing, dorky dad or uncle who thinks he is hilarious and he is, but because he's YOUR family member, you disapprove. However your friends encourage him and when someone else's family member falls into this bucket, you eat it up.

Today we had two new Kornheiser gems. He opened the show rapping Sir Mix-A- Lot and later during the live commercial cut in, explained to Barkley his issues with Lean Cuisine as a staple of an attempted diet. Below are both clips.

While PTI can sometimes be a bit of overkill in terms rehashing topics that are already a bit stale, the show thrives due mainly to the personalities and chemistry of the Wilbon and Kornheiser. With a decade in the books, my question to you is, what is the over/under of how much longer PTI will run with Kornheiser and Wilbon as hosts ? 5 years? 15 years? 20 years? Rarely in television do you see that type of longevity.

Courtesy of Fang's Bites and the NFL, we've learned today that on the day before the Super Bowl, the NFL is going to be putting on an awards show in Indianapolis on primetime network television. The categories for the event on NBC are about what you'd expect: MVP, Coach of the Year, Offensive and Defensive Players and Rookies of the Year, etc. But there are a couple of categories that seem a little... interesting. Like the "Madden Most Valuable Protectors" award. I assume that's going to an offensive lineman, recognized alongside higher profile skill position players? "Salute to Service" award? This may be recognizing a player for what I assume would be outstanding efforts in the community... but how is that different from the "Walter Payton NFL Man of the Year" award? Is the Man of the Year award going to now be given to the actual manliest man, like the one who wears the best flannel shirts and chops wood the best?

The NFL isn't the first league to run an awards show. The MLB had a disastrous Gold Glove awards show on ESPN back in November, and the NHL has their yearly awards ceremony, but here's the major difference between those two awards shows and the NFL's: they came after the season ended. The NFL's show comes before their championship game on national television in primetime. Are you really going to drag participants in the game away from preparing for the biggest game in sports for an AWARDS SHOW? "Hey Aaron, I know you have to figure out how you're going to pick apart the Ravens secondary, but you need to get your tux on and awkwardly sit around for three hours before getting your MVP award!" The whole idea just seems a little ludicrous to me.

The local choice is pretty amusing to me as well. Do you ever think any major awards show would hold their show in Indianapolis? I know they're holding it there because the Super Bowl is going to be there the next night, but it just seems like a desperate plea for people to come to Indy. Also, imagine how much more of a crunch this is going to be putting on the city. This just seems like a strange idea from the start.

One thing I forgot to mention: Alec Baldwin of NBC's 30 Rock will be hosting. You know, the 30 Rock that hasn't had its season premiere yet this year. Slick!

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This video isn't going to help ESPN's perception of bullying others in the media with their access, money, and influence.  After the Sugar Bowl, ESPN sideline reporter Holly Rowe would let nothing, not even another human being, stand in her way of getting Michigan coach Brady Hoke for ESPN's postgame interview.  If this were two years ago, Michigan actually could have used her on defense.  Holly goes full out Beast Mode (ala Marshawn Lynch) in elbowing this poor female reporter out of the way.  DeMarcus Cousins should take note of Holly's intensity and boxing out skills.  From now on, we better be careful what we say about ESPN, or else they'll send their enforcers our way...

(video via SportsGrid)

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Sunday night, Giants/Cowboys took the NFL's marquee stage for the second time this season as the only "play-in" game to the NFL Playoffs.  Even though we had seen these two teams on SNF just a few weeks ago, it was the only real choice to flex in Week 17.  The Giants and the Cowboys are two of the NFL's biggest draws, but how many fans would truly tune in to see a matchup between two nationally relevant, but perfectly mediocre teams?  Well, it turns out after seeing the latest ratings for SNF, the Week 17 showdown between the Giants and Cowboys was a perfect ratings storm for NBC.  From the Washington Post...

It's going to be an interesting week for the round mound of rebound... then again maybe with this weight loss thing that nickname may have to be adjusted.  Anyways, TNT's Charles Barkley takes his talents this week outside the Inside the NBA studio.  First, he'll join Kevin Harlan and Reggie Miller for a three man booth on the call for Heat/Hawks.  According to SMW, it's the first time Barkley has been in the announcing booth since March 2010.  

This definitely seems like a one time appearance in the broadcast booth with TNT having a game in Atlanta where the Turner studio is based. But it's worth watching if TNT keeps tinkering with the analyst spot there because Reggie Miller is last on the totem pole of NBA personalities working with Turner for basketball fans.  Chris Webber will fill Barkley's slot in the studio alongside Ernie Johnson, Kenny Smith, and Shaq.  C-Web is one of the most underrated analysts on television, so hopefully TNT will give him more airtime throughout the season.

After his broadcast booth cameo on Thursday, Barkley then goes to New York to host Saturday Night Live for the third time.  Barkley last hosted SNL in the first week of 2010.  I wish I could tell you whether Saturday Night Live is still funny or not, but I stopped watching around the same time I stopped watching new episodes of the Simpsons.  I'm willing to bet that Sir Charles is funnier than at least half the cast at the moment.

Barkley's high profile week got me thinking about a bigger picture question.  Has any athlete been more successful in transitioning from a playing career to a media career?  CSNPhilly says Barkley's third hosting appearance is a record for an athlete and the last two have come well into his TNT career.  That's an impressive line to have on your resume.  John Madden built a media empire as the top NFL analyst for decades, but that came after being head coach of the Raiders.  Many former great players are terrible on television while others stick around too long and have the public turn on them (see Morgan, Joe and McCarver, Tim).  There are better pure analysts, but nobody is funnier and has more widespread crossover appeal than Charles Barkley.  That may change in the future though... as long as Jay Bilas keeps tweeting Young Jeezy lyrics.  

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It can't be easy to always bat 1.000 when doing promos, but this is a hilarious geography fail that would make Dan Quayle proud.  In this promo for the Orange Bowl, Brad Nessler (one of the best in the biz) goes back in time about 150 years in looking forward to the West Virginia-Clemson game.  I guess he wasn't around for the Wheeling Conventions that split West Virginia from Virginia before the Civil War.  Not the annual game between Oregon and Oregon State, the real thing...

"the Clemson Tigers, champions of the ACC, take on another team from the state of Virginia... West Virginia..."

[Thanks to trumpetchad via patricksouthern]

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The importance of New Year's Day bowl games in the BCS era is certainly up for debate, but sports fans can all agree on one thing: Jan. 2nd, 2012 was made more enjoyable because of the absence of one Craig James.  Awful Announcing and Bloguin's college football blog Crystal Ball Run were the first to tell you that Craig James was departing ESPN to pursue the Republican nomination for the U.S. Senate from Texas.  And now that James has officially left the network to run for office, it was only a matter of time before James' first attempt at a political ad to introduce himself to voters would become public.  College football fans (and fans of sanity in general) can apparently thank those "strong business leaders in Texas" for taking James out of the booth and into politics.

Shockingly in his first official ad, James doesn't directly address that whole killing five hookers at SMU rumor. But, the rest of James' ad is about what you would expect from a Texas Republican.  It's about as Texan as Texas can be, complete with a cut to James grinning in a cowboy hat while trumpeting his conservative credentials and values. Apparently, fighting your whiny kid's battles and getting Texas Tech's football coach fired while keeping your job at ESPN despite a massive conflict of interest qualifies James as a "conservative," although none of that is mentioned.  On a related note, thanks to SI's Richard Deitsch for reminding everyone that it's been 123 days since ESPN's ombudsman, the Poynter Institute, promised to examine James' tenure at the network.

One other interesting takeaway from the ad is James lining himself up with former Texas Govenor Rick Perry... you know, the same Rick Perry who did this at a presidential debate.  Come to think of it, James was to the broadcast booth what Perry has been to presidential debates, although somehow even more of an incompetent disgrace.  Have no fear, this blog certainly won't be turning in to Politico by any stretch, but you can bet we'll be keeping an eye on Craig James' quest to make Texas great again through his belief in America!  How original!  How inspiring!  How... absurd.

Despite a thrilling, come from behind 3-2 victory for the New York Rangers, their Winter Classic in Citizens Bank Park against the Philadelphia Flyers drew the lowest ratings in the five year history of the game, coming in with an overnight mark of 2.4. The main culprit can be one of a few reasons.

Firstly, the game wasn't on its traditional New Year's Day timeslot, and instead took place on the 2nd of January. The reason for that has more to do with the dominance of the NFL, which also forced the NCAA to shift its traditional New Year's Day bowl games to the 2nd as opposed to the 1st. Secondly, the time slot for the game was pushed back from 1 PM to 3 PM, due to more favorable weather conditions. You really can't use that as an excuse though, due to last year's game at Heinz Field between the Penguins and Capitals being shifted back because of rain earlier in the day.  Then again, maybe Mike Milbury quickly turned off viewers with this quote.

The competitive nature of the Outback Bowl probably had something to do with the low ratings the game got. Michigan State, down 16-0 at the half, began a furious comeback in the third quarter, right around the time the game was starting. Our football-crazed society probably had more interest in a tight football game between a pair of top 25 teams than a midseason hockey game between two of the top teams in the Eastern Conference. I'm not saying that watching the football game was the *correct* choice (because let's be honest, there really isn't a correct choice in a matter of opinion like this), but hockey takes a backseat to football. ESPN doesn't give the sport all that much airtime anymore, which greatly angers hockey fans, and because of that I'm wondering how many casual fans even knew that the Winter Classic was going on yesterday.

The game itself was very entertaining, with the Flyers blowing a two goal lead in the final 25 minutes of the game, and then having star center Danny Briere get stonewalled by Henrik Lundqvist on a penalty shot with 20 seconds remaining that would have tied the game. Many hockey fans are speculating about the refereeing in the game, with even Rangers head coach John Tortorella calling the officiating "disgusting." If more eyeballs tuned into the game and saw the horrid officiating, maybe the NHL would actually do something about it. Or maybe they'd just ignore it, and alienate more fans in the process. I'd bet on the latter, personally.

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Remember, the NBA is offering NBA League Pass for free through Sunday, January 8.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Houston Rockets @ Los Angeles Lakers (NBA TV 10:30PM) Ernie Johnson, Chris Webber, Greg Anthony

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Washington Wizards @ Orlando Magic (NBA TV 7PM) Local Broadcast
Houston Rockets @ Los Angeles Clippers (NBA TV 10:30PM) Local Broadcast

Thursday, January 5

Miami Heat @ Atlanta Hawks (TNT 8PM) Kevin Harlan, Reggie Miller
Los Angeles Lakers @ Portland Trail Blazers (TNT 10:30PM) TBA

Friday, January 6, 2012

Chicago Bulls @ Orlando Magic (ESPN 8PM) Mike Breen, Jeff Van Gundy
Portland Trailblazers @ Phoenix Suns (ESPN 10:30) Dan Shulman, Hubie Brown

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Charlotte Bobcats @ Indiana Pacers (NBA TV 7PM) Local Broadcast
Milwaukee Bucks @ Los Angeles Clippers (NBA TV 10:30PM) Local Broadcast

Sunday, January 8, 2012

San Antonio Spurs @ Oklahoma City Thunder (NBA TV 7PM) Local Broadcast

H/T Sammy; more after the jump.

I had anticipated taking a larger look at all the announcing from the day after New Year's Day... until the Fiesta Bowl last night.  That was when Matt Millen had a largely exclusive broadcast window for the nation to revel in his football knowledge, weird logic, mixed up cliches, and overall ineptitude as an announcer.  As I wrote on Twitter last night, it was an epic performance in the annals of AA - on par with what Vince Young did to USC in the National Championship Game.  Before your tweets about Matt Millen, here are just some of the announcing gems he laid on the nation last night.  Confucius would be proud...

"He bores you with completions, he bores you with efficiency," on Andrew Luck.

"You can't make a small mistake, like falling down... which is a big mistake."

Calling Jesse Palmer - "Jesse the Body."

"Sometimes you have to lose one for the Gipper."

"They'll both do well at the next level. BRANDON WEEDEN IS 28 YEARS OLD!"

"It's not about the decision making (of Luck), it's the decision making under pressure."

"He's hungry. You feed him."

"It's strength vs weakness on both sides, but it's the weakness who is stronger.. is the team that will prevail"

"When he gets inside of a guy and bends his hips, he's pretty good"

"That was helmet to helmet... I like it."

That's a complete list of Pammies quotes all by himself!  Liking helmet to helmet hits?  Being bored by Andrew Luck's performance?  Insulting the legacy of Jesse "The Body" Ventura?!?!  What was ESPN thinking giving Matt Millen the best bowl matchup outside of the national championship game on the night of January 2nd?  Stanford v Oklahoma State will certainly be memorable for being a dramatic classic, but it's also memorable for us to remember what college football fans think of ESPN's #2 analyst.  

Is it too late for Millen to enter the Texas Senate race too?  As always, these are Real Tweets from Real People...