I had anticipated taking a larger look at all the announcing from the day after New Year's Day... until the Fiesta Bowl last night. That was when Matt Millen had a largely exclusive broadcast window for the nation to revel in his football knowledge, weird logic, mixed up cliches, and overall ineptitude as an announcer. As I wrote on Twitter last night, it was an epic performance in the annals of AA - on par with what Vince Young did to USC in the National Championship Game. Before your tweets about Matt Millen, here are just some of the announcing gems he laid on the nation last night. Confucius would be proud...
"He bores you with completions, he bores you with efficiency," on Andrew Luck.
"You can't make a small mistake, like falling down... which is a big mistake."
Calling Jesse Palmer - "Jesse the Body."
"Sometimes you have to lose one for the Gipper."
"They'll both do well at the next level. BRANDON WEEDEN IS 28 YEARS OLD!"
"It's not about the decision making (of Luck), it's the decision making under pressure."
"He's hungry. You feed him."
"It's strength vs weakness on both sides, but it's the weakness who is stronger.. is the team that will prevail"
"When he gets inside of a guy and bends his hips, he's pretty good"
"That was helmet to helmet... I like it."
That's a complete list of Pammies quotes all by himself! Liking helmet to helmet hits? Being bored by Andrew Luck's performance? Insulting the legacy of Jesse "The Body" Ventura?!?! What was ESPN thinking giving Matt Millen the best bowl matchup outside of the national championship game on the night of January 2nd? Stanford v Oklahoma State will certainly be memorable for being a dramatic classic, but it's also memorable for us to remember what college football fans think of ESPN's #2 analyst.
Is it too late for Millen to enter the Texas Senate race too? As always, these are Real Tweets from Real People...