It's an exciting new day in the history of Awful Announcing! Time to take an AA staple, the Pam Ward Chronicles, to the NFL. We asked our readers who they wanted to honor with this distinction, and by one solitary vote, Dick Stockton defeated Joe Buck. I think the Straight Outta Stockton name and the image of Dick hanging with N.W.A. singing Straight Outta Compton pushed it over the top!
The Dickies (that may need a little extra consideration) will work in the same manner as the Pammies. Throughout the day (and on Monday nights), leave us the most awful, innuendo filled, hilarious, or bizarre quotes that you hear surrounding NFL gamedays. The Dick Stockton Chronicles will focus on the announcers in the booth, but with men like Chris Berman, Terry Bradshaw, Shannon Sharpe, Trent Dilfer and many others filling studios, we certainly need your watchful eyes on these shows as well.
These AA staples depend on our readers, so leave comments on the Open Thread or tweet us with your Straight Outta Stockton submissions. Keep in mind we need quotes, and not just general statements about announcers.
NO: Dick Stockton is old and terrible.
YES: "3rd downs are always important. This is the first important 3rd down of the game." - Dick Stockton
We'll try and update the thread as best as we can on Sundays, but you can check the comments below and our Twitter timeline for all submissions. Then, we'll be back on Tuesdays with 15-20 nominees and you'll vote on our Top 10 for the week. Dickie winners will be announced Thursdays with updated standings.
As I leave, believe I'm stompin, but when I come back, boy, I'm comin' straight outta Stockton!
*Update: Don't forget to update our Straight Outta Stockton open thread tonight with the best and worst quotes from Monday Night Football. With news tonight that "That Guy" Jon Gruden has reupped for five more seasons with MNF, we could be in for a vintage performance from Gruden and Jaws!
"If I tell you a chicken dips snuff, you better look under his wing for a can!" - Terry Bradshaw (via SoonerCharley)
"Olindo MAH-re." - Dick Stockton (via sctvman) getting his syllAble emphasis mixed up.
Tough play there by Olive Mughelli" - John Lynch (via tojogt08) Um, John, its Ovie Mughelli, but thanks for playing!
"no wide receivers here on 3rd and goal for philadelphia" - Sam Rosen (via bjo109) as they clearly have 3 WRs.
"you've got a lot of beef up in there" - Brian Billick (via MatttheKuhn)