ESPN reporter Jenn Brown had a bit of an adventure this morning when she evidently found herself locked inside her own hotel bathroom.  It's a slow news day, what can I say.  Here's the proof via Twitter...

You can decide which is slightly more embarrassing - publicly locking oneself in a hotel bathroom or calling a head coach "Bitch Jones" on national television.  Fortunately for Jenn, she had her cell phone with her so she could call somebody to rescue her.    Fortunately for us, this also means she had a chance to tweet about it and answer your important questions in the moment...

JennBrownESPN Any one who wants to stay warm whilst taking a shower...Duh RT @SchwarzAdam: who closes the bathroom door in a hotel!

JennBrownESPN Pretty much... RT @tcumike: So you are just sitting in there chilling, and tweeting?

JennBrownESPN think I'll go with my flavored vitamins first, but good to know! RT @ROTHENbenRG: I heard the decorative soaps taste like candy.

JennBrownESPN That, my friend, is a very good question... RT @ttintn: just curious... Had you not had your cell what woulda been your plan?

JennBrownESPN Someone who listens to ESPN Radio in the morning RT @SchwarzAdam who brings their phone into the bathroom to take a shower to begin with?

JennBrownESPN Could have come in handy in this situation...could have MacGyvered my way out. RT @bustedcoverage: did you open my wedding gift yet?

Nobody asked if she doesn't like Craig James, too?  I'm disappointed Twitter!  Oh well, we can now cross live tweeting being locked in a hotel bathroom off the "Things Twitter Can't Do" list.  At least she didn't lock her keys out of her car.  Thankfully after what must have seemed like an eternity isolated from the non-tweeting outside world, Jenn Brown was finally freed...

Seriously though, I can definitely empathize with Jenn Brown's escapades.  You may want to snarkishly label this a "blond moment" but I've been known to try to open random cars in parking lots that just happen to look like mine.   Things like this happen to me all the time.  I'm such an expert at being locked out of places, Billy Hunter has been calling me for help in negotiations. (rimshot)  

Hey, Frank Caliendo can't be the only person allowed to do lame semi-culturally relevant sports jokes, can he?

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ESPN televised a Gold Glove awards special last night, although according to the reviews, there wasn't much special about it.  While the awards themselves were questionable, there was also the format of the show, the analysis, and the actual ESPYish presentation to consider as well.  The following is from Lead Editor Joe Lucia of Bloguin's MLB blog - The Outside Corner, on the ridiculousness of the show and the awards presentation.  Clayton Kershaw was clearly not entertained.

After being delayed 45 minutes because of a MAC football game that featured over 120 points being scored, ESPN's broadcast of the Gold Glove awards "ceremony" started at around 10:45 tonight. First off, why would you schedule something like this behind a live event that has potential to run late? That's just a ridiculous idea to begin with. I'm not sure why the need for a show like this was even needed, especially needing to be stretched to AN HOUR.

The panel featured Karl Ravech presenting, with John Kruk and Barry Larkin making their picks for the awards. Typically, their picks didn't focus on defense, with the duo talking about how great offensively their choices were, along with mixing in various vague descriptors like "you go to the ballpark to see him play defense." They also were stuck in the old school mentality, talking about errors and fielding percentage, which are two of the more inane ways to describe a player's defense in 2011.

ESPN would bring out a "special guest" to present each "segment" of awards. They didn't exactly bring out superstars either, with former Cardinal Mike Matheny announcing the catcher and pitcher winners, former Oriole Paul Blair, who was in his prime 35 years ago, announcing the outfield winners, and Omar Vizquel announcing the infield winners. None seemed very comfortable, with Blair coming off like a pretty big asshole talking himself up (including claiming to have never made an error, when he actually made 54 over his career). Vizquel seemed all out of sorts, stuttering through the announcements of winners and having Ravech fill in some of his blanks.

And then, there were the winners:

American League
P: Mark Buerhle
C: Matt Wieters
1B: Adrian Gonzalez
2B: Dustin Pedroia
3B: Adrian Beltre
SS: Erick Aybar
LF: Alex Gordon
CF: Jacoby Ellsbury
RF: Nick Markakis

National League
P: Clayton Kershaw
C: Yadier Molina
1B: Joey Votto
2B: Brandon Phillips
3B: Placido Polanco
SS: Troy Tulowitzki
LF: Gerardo Parra
CF: Matt Kemp
RF: Andre Ethier

Among the list of snubs, Brett Gardner was downright robbed in left field for the AL. He was far and away the best defender in baseball at any position, and he's going home empty handed. The same could be said for Peter Bourjos in center. Markakis winning is an absolute joke, and he clearly won the award because "he has a good arm"... considering that's all they talked about after he won.

Oh, and to put a cherry on top of this? Fans didn't even need to watch the awards show. The AP put out a press release before the show started....which ESPN put on their website. I wish I would have known about that more than 25 minutes into this, so I didn't have to sit through that disaster.

Check out more great baseball coverage, including the Movember MLB Mustache Madness Tournament, at The Outside Corner

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It was a shame that this year fans were deprived of Hard Knocks but if you're a boxing fan, HBO has again knocked it out of the park with their 24/7 coverage of Manny Pacquiao and Juan Manual Marquez's preparation for their November 12th fight. 

Two episodes in, we have the answer to the million dollar question: Does Marquez continue to drink his own urine? He explains below...

Well I am glad that's over. Still seems a bit odd that it took a new doctor and strength coach to plant the seed that maybe drinking your own urine isn't the best way to get into optimal fighting shape. Perhaps they don't have GNC stores in Mexico.

For those of you who are scratching your head in disbelief, below is the infamous clip from Marquez's 24/7 series leading up to his whooping at the hands of Floyd Mayweather.

Disclaimer: You hit the play button... you're going to see Marquez drinking pee. It's disturbing. If you don't want to see it, then just walk away.

While HBO's full access has been awesome in many instances, the above clip is the reason is a good example when keeping it real goes terribly wrong. Viewers were totally shocked as was Mayweather's entourage, and now Marquez's reputation to the casual fan is now mostly tied to just a very poor choice of a beverage. 

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Yes, I'll admit it, I have a soft spot in my heart for all things British when it comes to announcing. Maybe it's the dry British wit, the dulcet tones of the British accent, or their slighly off-beat nature, but it seems no matter the sport it's easy to find entertaining examples of British announcers.  In the past, we've unearthed gems like the cricket commentator who announced his impending doom and a pair of Brits who practicallly orgasmed over mountain biking.  And thanks to our pal Jimmy Traina over at SI's Hot Clicks, we can now add this World Series clip to our expanding AA Brit portfolio.

Apparently, BBC 5 over in England has been broadcasting the World Series back to our mother courntry for several years.  Although true Brits most likely prefer baseball's cousin cricket, it is truly entertaining to hear the take on announcing the national pasttime from across the pond.  And while Joe Buck's finest moment ever might have been David Freese's game-winning home run in Game 6, it's also fun to hear this call from Simon Brotherton of the BBC.

Simon's Wikipedia page describes his commentating style as "quirky" but I think it's the usual British charm that comes off in this clip.  The bewilderment, the pronunciation of Card-in-als as if it were three seperate words, and the picture-perfect capturing of the moment are all traits of the best of British announcers in any sport, whether they're native to the UK or not.  

[Hot Clicks]

It was a depressing week for me personally in the NFL.  First, my Saints lost to the winless St. Louis Rams in a disappointing loss that took me back to the Days of Ditka.  Compounding this sadness was sitting through an entire NFL game with Chris Myers and Tim Ryan while watching your team lose to a winless club.  Let's hope this week's Dickies nominees are enough to lift my spirits...

As to how the Straight Outta Stockton vote works, each week we'll nominate 15-20 quotes for you to pick the best 10.  The winning quote of the week will earn that person 10 points all the way down to 1 point for 10th.  Remember, you can vote for your favorite five quotes.  Here are your Week 8 nominees...

1A) "And right now the crowd is saying 'Release the Kraken'!" - Dan Dierdorf (via sa9273)

1B) "And the Kraken is on the loose." - Dan Dierdorf (via CK29).  He sure loves his Kraken...

2) "I'm trying to guess run or pass but I'm wrong on every play" - Phil Simms (via jackbutler505)

3) "When you get DeAngelo Williams in there, you can bang it around in the insides." - Daryl Johnston (via bjo109)

4) "St Louis will try to spread them out here and then slide it in." - Tim Ryan (via bjo109)

5) "And a timeout is called for delay of the game. Excuse me." - Dick Stockton (via ClarkbarTweets)

6) Al Michaels: "Herremans is like the Swiss Army Knife of offensive linemen."
Cris Collinsworth: "I called him a tool in the meeting earlier." (via BloggerJustinF) 

7) "Ted Turner takes the timeout" - Mike Tirico (via Frigidevil)

8) "Ponder thinks about Harvin. Harvin doesn't have to Ponder the throw.  That sets up the veteran, he's been around a LONG time, Ryan Longwell." - Chris Berman (via CK29) in rapid succession on The Blitz

9) "That was very well put, but i have no idea what he said." - Brian Billick (via bjo109)

10) "Stafford handing off to Maurcie Morris. Faking it and throwing it." - Dick Stockton (via Dascenzo)

11) "Bills in Toronto, there's the Space Needle." - Dan Patrick (via bjo109)

12) "You've got to get fresh with that top hand and ride that center" - Jon Gruden (via CaptTouchback)

13) "Quarterback Ron Fitzgerald, Buffalo, he will reward that Buffalo franchise for giving him that contract. Big day..." - Terry Bradshaw (via AlexFromBuffalo) Just all wrong.

14) "Matt Cassell is a winner" - Jon Gruden (via ThisisERV) with this week in sports cliches.

15) "Cliff Avril picks the ball up on the interception and goes in for the touchdown." - Dick Stockton (via Dascenzo)

16) Jim Nantz: "What a heads up play!"
Phil Simms: "Well, that's illegal." (via several) 

17) "You know what NFL means? The National Fake You Out Leauge" - Tim Ryan (via Chris)

Vote For Your Week 8 Dickies Nominees! (vote for up to five)

The winners will come Thursday morning so make sure you vote early and often and check back for the full NFL Week 9 announcing sked later this week!

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Twitter is great for breaking news... and also for hashtags that have the capability to immediately mock said breaking news.  Yesterday, it was reported (shockingly) that Kim Kardashian's marriage ended after 72 DAYS to otherwise anonymous NBAer Kris Humphries.  Against all odds, this marriage turned into a traveshamockery faster than you could say, well, traveshamockery.  So much for the sanctity of marriage.

The trending tag that arose in light of this stunning news was #ThingsLongerThanKimsMarriage.  Of course, there are way too many sports examples to let this pass by unnoticed.  We thought of a couple, but also took to Twitter for your ideas as well.  Below are Things Longer Than Kim's Marriage and the matching Twitter handles of our tweeps.  As always, these are Real Tweets from Real People...

Joe Buck Live (awfulannouncing)

The Eagles Dream Team (rhymeswithfish)

Rush Limbaugh, NFL analyst (awfulannouncing)

Brett Favre's Retirements (CaptTouchback)

The XFL (TlkSuperstation and others)

TCU in the Big East (TheSamAntics and others)

The NBA Lockout (awfulannouncing... sadly this isn't a joke, this is fact)

Doug Flutie's Hail Mary (KennethTherrian)

Visanthe Shiancoe (AdamGangl)

The last 2 minutes of an NCAA Tourney game (astem00)

Bruce Feldman's suspension (mattyzucks)

The OJ trial (FreddiePhysical)

Greg Oden (JasonJayPetri and others)

Tiki Barber's media career (Ja_Meadows)

A New Jersey Nets winning streak (JoshuaBatelli)

Quite Frankly with Stephen A. Smith (TlkSuperstation)

Kris Humphries' NBA career (awfulannouncing)

Billy Donovan, Magic Head Coach (JagsFan93)

The Preakness (YoPaulieNJ)

Lance Lynn's World Series Game 5 appearance (curtgOK)

A Tony La Russa pitching change (aeronaut005)

John Lackey's ERA (TheZaharaDesert)

The Magic Hour (psicher)

Dennis Miller on Monday Night Football (thejohnmarx)

And finally...

Khloe and Lamar (awfulannouncing)

Thankfully, true love still does exist somewhere in this cruel world...

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Week 10 in the NFL, the weekend of November 10, marks the first week of NFL's "flexible schedule." The flex scheduling gives the NFL the ability to switch out games that the league thought were going to be viewer friendly when originally putting the schedule together in favor of better match ups. Last year, the NFL didn't flex primetime until Week 16 and then flexed it again in Week 17. Both switches turned out very 'meh.'

The NFL has smartly decided not to mess with the Pats/Jets Sunday Night Football game already planned for Week 10 and simply pushed the Lions/Bears game back to 4:15 p.m. EST. I can't see the NFL really flexing its muscles until Week 13 when the Colts are supposed to play the Patriots on SNF. I think Bengals/Steelers, Falcons/Texans, Lions/Saints, and Packers/Giants are the match ups that could wind up in prime time (ed. note: if they're not one of the games protected by FOX or CBS). It'll be interesting to see how the NFL handles it when the time comes, assuming things don't change too much over the next few weeks. 

With the exception of Week 17 (which is six days to ensure a game with playoff implications), the NFL must make flex decisions at least 12 days before the games. The NFL can flex this year in Weeks 10-15 and Week 17 (Week 16 has 13 games being played on Saturday, December 24, so there will be no flexible scheduling that week).

Week 10 also marks the first Thursday Night Football on NFL Network game of the season between the Raiders/Chargers. 

(AP Photo/Nam Y. Huh)

Adande is the NBA lockout. Woody Paige is self explanatory. Cowlinshaw is Ron Swanson and is still in character five minutes into the show as is Macmullan who is Lady Gaga. 

Not too bad and we'll see if PTI follows suit. Still not my favorite sports Halloween costume of all time and I am still holding out hope someone will dress up as Deion Sanders/The Football Fairy this year. 

There's also these Woody Paige selections captured by bubbaprog as (shudders) Snooki...

And, presumably, The Situation...

AA readers, have you seen any sports related costumes that we should know about?

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With the great Cardinals/Rangers World Series in the books, it's time to take a look at Fox's coverage of the World Series with The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly.  Believe it or not, this was year number 14 that Fox has had the World Series and the 12th consecutive since 2000.  With that in mind, Fox had some new elements for this year that stood out, but there was also a lot of the same ol' same ol' that has grown tiresome over the years.  

The Good

Is the 2011 World Series the moment we'll look back on as when the blogosphere and baseball fans tuned into the internet and Twitter turned in favor of Joe Buck?  Yes, Joe Buck, in the good section looking at MLB on Fox.  I can't believe it either.  For whatever reason (maybe it was his hometown team in the World Series), Buck brought his "A" game throughout the series and actually seemed interested.  For as much as the blogs pound Buck for his disinterested and dispassionate announcing, he was on top of the big moments when it counted.  His call in Game 6 was great and the channeling of his father was appropriate and memorable.  Also, Buck, perhaps more than any other announcer, knows when to step away and let the moment speak for itself.  If Joe continues to keep up this level of enthusiasm on every telecast and leaves behind some of the smugness and lame jokes, he could actually (gasp!!!) continue to win fans over.

Fox has always pushed the envelope in terms of game production and this year was no different.  Sometimes it leads to embarrassments to our democracy like Scooter, but other times it works.  Although Fox gets a little crazy some times with the crowd shots (thank God there are no marching bands in baseball), their folks are usually on top of everything that happens on the field.  The fancy element added this year was an infrared camera coming from overseas and used on cricket coverage.  Even though the infrared camera was laughed at by most people, it actually turned out to be useful on a couple key plays in the World Series.  While it is far from the most efficient technological advance in baseball coverage, it at least shows that Fox is trying to push new boundaries on at least one aspect of their baseball coverage (we'll get to where they aren't in a second).

For those of you that may have wondered, "why is that dork Ken Rosenthal wearing a bowtie" during the World Series... it was actually a season long initiative from the Fox reporter to benefit charity.  Sideline reporters may or may not add much in terms of game broadcasts (NFL on CBS has ditched them completely), but it's always nice to see someone in the business do something for a good cause - fashionable or not.  And, Rosenthal is one of the best at what he does.  Bravo, Ken.

And finally, the World Series itself was a classic.  Even outside of an epic Game 6, the series produced several enthralling games and moments.  It wasn't the best played baseball at times, but there's no doubting the drama this seven game series produced.  The story of the Cardinals even making the playoffs was stunning enough, but then winning the World Series, especially coming back in Games 6 & 7, was incredible.  And then there's that Game 6, which may be the most exciting baseball game of our lifetimes.

What you're about to see is one of the most frightening segments I've ever seen on an NFL pregame show.  Not frightening in the sense that it has a Halloween theme and it's actually scary... frightening in the sense that it is just plain awful.  This is so scary, it belongs in the last hour of the Today Show.  Former Jets DT Kris Jenkins, who's been doing work with the NFL Today, welcomes children strategically dressed as NFL personalities to his "home."  

I haven't seen enough of him as an analyst to make a judgment one way or another, but there's a reason he's a football player instead of an actor.  His opening lines are delivered with the believability and passion of Joe Buck announcing a meeting at the mound.  And man, Kris Jenkins likes to say "man" a lot.  If he hates Tom Brady for taking his Super Bowl rings, why is there a picture of him in his house?

Why are three children, obviously already in costume, carrying around giant quarters?

Why does Dan Marino look like a young John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever?

Why can you actually comprehend what the child portraying Shannon Sharpe is saying?

Why does LeBron James show up?

Why is a child dressed as Tim Tebow also wearing a giant quarter?  And why is she spinning?

Who invited Urkel?

There are just a few of many questions that arise in this segment.  Watch if you dare, it's a guaranteed spook.  Considering the inane, pointless quality of fake-laugh filled NFL pregame shows these days, this video goes above and beyond the call of duty.  Your move, Frank Caliendo.

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