T.J. Simers of the LA Times writes that the Dodgers are asking their season ticket holders to fill out a seemingly pointless survey, in which they grade one of the greatest announcers of all-time Vin Scully:

On a scale of 1 to 5, "They wanted my opinion of Vin Scully in the following eight areas: 1. Knowledge of baseball; 2. Knowledge of Dodgers organization; 3. Objectivity; 4. Accuracy of calls; 5. Storytelling ability; 6. Focus on the game; 7. Style; 8. Overall performance.

"This is like polling Catholics about Mother Teresa's work," he said. "This is Vin's 62nd year behind the microphone in a broadcasting career that no one will ever emulate. Is this portion of the survey really necessary?

When Simers emailed the Dodgers about Scully's job security, a team spokeman predictably responded Scully's job "is his as long as he wants it." Frankly, I'm surprised Scully hasn't been given the keys to that entire organization, yet.

You know the whole "What if Mike Vick was ___ ?" bit that went on Thursday? Well, I feel like we could definitely have some fun with this one, too: "Asking the fans to rate Vin Scully is like polling ____ about _____." (Feel free to leave your best in the comments).

Interestingly enough, AA's inbox received an email at the end of July from non-season ticket holder John asking us to add VIN SCULLY to the list of AWFUL ANNOUNCERS. My first thought was to simply respond "no," but the email was well-written, thoughtful, and (sigh) his opinion, so instead I decided to respond respectfully.

While we received permission to post it as a dissenting opinion on a subject I always thought had unanimous benediction, we wound up not posting it because the JMMT was drawing to a close and it just felt too... random.

But I guess now - while Dodgers season ticket holders mull over how they'll evaluate Scully - is as good as any to finally present the other side that actually exists:

AA Team:

Good day. Love your website; check it every day for the latest. Keep up the great work.

Regarding Vin Scully, the longtime voice of the Dodgers: first I must say that he is truly a hall of fame announcer and should be commended for his 60 years of baseball announcing. However, at this point in time I think it’s time for Vin to call it a day.

As a diehard SF Giants fan, I eagerly tuned in to Monday night’s MLB Network Extra Innings telecast of the Giants/Dodgers game. If only one feed is available, you don’t know until the game comes on the air which team’s feed you will receive. Instead of the excellent team of Duane Kuiper and Mike Krukow, I was forced to listen to nine innings of Vin Scully. The entire game, one announcer, no analyst.

Vin no longer announces the game, he tells stories. He thinks his melodic, dulcet tones and old school vocabulary add to the viewing of the game. Nothing could be further from the truth. I tune in to watch a baseball game. I want to hear current information and statistics that will help me learn more about the teams and perhaps anticipate specific developments within the game.

I do not want to hear a five-minute dissertation on what happened in a minor league game when an ambidextrous pitcher faced a switch-hitter. I don’t want Vin to read player’s biographies from the media guide. I don’t care who first wore batting gloves. Tell me about this team, these players and what they are doing this season, this month, this week.

Vin is 86 years old and when announcing night games he begins to “sundown”, mispronouncing player’s names, repeating information he has delivered earlier in the game, and detracting from the presentation.

I found myself muting the sound and watching the game in silence. Not so bad, but a good analyst will give you information and observations that add to your enjoyment of the game and enhance your understanding of it. Krukow provides that on nearly every Giants telecast I receive and it is a real treat.

I am a mid-fifties boomer and a lifelong baseball fan, so this is not a youth-driven rant against an old guy. You guys provide a service and an outlet for big-time sports fans who despise poor announcing. That’s me in a nutshell.

Thanks for listening.

John

[LA Times]

 

Ray Lewis decided to take a stab at doing play-by-play announcing during the last seconds of the Ravens comeback win against the Redskins. As you can hear, mostly Lewis showcased his very excellent grunting skills in increasing decibel levels as the Ravens moved the ball down the field. Here's Lewis' attempt at describing an 11 yard WR screen.

"Oh, WR screen. HAW! HAW! HO-HAW!"

Easily my favorite part of the bit was when Lewis described 6th round rookie from Va. Tech, Tyrod Taylor, as the human highlight reel. Sorry Dominique, that nickname now belongs to preseason hero Tyrod Taylor.

Just so you know, the last play was initially ruled down at the 1, robbing us of volume 2,000 grunts. The play was reviewed, and called a touchdown.  Sadly, I missed getting video of much of Lewis' "tryout" because he spent much of the time sprinting away from Suzy Kolber anytime a Raven touched the ball. Things that were awesome that were missed...

A) Joe Flacco with a deathwish surprised Lewis by pouring a glass of water on his head at the beginning of the interview. Tirico excitedly exclaimed, "Was that Flacco?! NICE." Lewis did not look amused.

B) A near punt return. Lewis' description was something like, "OHHH OHHHHH OHHAHAHA AHHH OHH" followed by him sprinting away from Kolber.

C) After the win, Lewis went up to anyone wearing purple and excitedly yelled, "THAT'S FOOTBAWL! THAT'S FOOTBALLL! THAT'S FOOTBALL! THAT'S HOW YOU PLAY FREAKING FOOTBAWL"

It really just doesn't get much more exciting than the 4th quarter of the third NFL preseason game.

The crew on MLB Network's 411 Fantasy show -- Jeremy Brisiel, Cory Schwartz, and Mike Siano Nando Difino -- experienced the Tuesday earthquake while they were on the set. While they didn't sprint off camera like Ravens' rookie wide receiver Torrey Smith, they were definitely shaken* by their trembling studio.

Despite Cory Schwartz saying "holy shit" twice, Jeremy Brisiel definitely appears the most anxious, especially near the end when Schwartz basically goads Brisiel by providing the doom and gloom scenario.

*pun definitely intended!

[H/T Steve via BroBible]

From the way of the Crossover Chronicles, here's comedian playing reporter, Jason Sereno, stepping into the octagon for a sparring session with the NBA's Al Harrington. There's a slight athletic mismatch here as Harrington out-everything's him by a significant margin. Unfortunately for Sereno, Harrington beats on him like he was asking for his beach cruiser back. Yes, the video and sadly the punch were I'm sure faked, but I definitely laughed watching it.

I love that Sereno is wearing socks and a green button up while throwing short jabs at Harrington. Those jabs remind me of those almost completely pointless low kicks from Mortal Kombat that did no damage.


[Crossover Chronicles]

ESPN's ludicrous decision to whiteitize Michael Vick amidst its ESPN The Vick magazine issue drew outrage, ire, and disbelief from nearly all corners of the web.  Even the author of the article took offense to ESPN's labeling of his article, that specifically addresses the inability to ask wonder how things would be differeint if Michael Vick were white, with a picture of White Vick and the title "What If Michael Vick Were White?"  This enitre episode crosses into realms of stubbornness, insensitivity, cluelessness, and just general laziness.  Clearly, White Vick was only done to create pageviews and controversy.  A comment to The Big Lead from ESPN talking about "the discussion" is all you need to know.  I'm all for more meaningful discourse about racial issues in sports, but this is not the way to do it.  So let's put ourselves into the shoes of ESPN the Magazine and hypothetically and pointlessly wonder, what if White Michael Vick was...

What if White Michael Vick was an Avatar...


What if White Michael Vick was a real eagle (via Joe Sports Fan)...

What if White Michael Vick was a master of disguise...

What if White Michael Vick was a cartoon character...



What if White Michael Vick promised hope and change...


And of course, what if White Michael Vick had a mullet...

What if ESPN had the common sense to never introduce White Michael Vick to the world?  That would be nice.
 

Tomorrow, ESPN Magazine's 2011 NFL Preview will hit the shelves... more accurately, the Michael Vick Preview will hit the shelves with some other filler is thrown in.  There will be other stories in the issue, but it will be totally dominated by Vick with no less than four major stories about the Eagles QB.  Here's the details from ESPN's release...

In the latest issue of ESPN The Magazine on newsstands Friday, August 26, fans will get up close and personal with Philadelphia Eagles’ starting QB, Michael Vick, as The Mag shares its first ever issue committed so exclusively to one athlete. Overall, the issue offers readers a 360 degree look at how Michael Vick explains the NFL and all its fault lines, full of startling revelations and original insight into his evolution as a QB, his time in prison, and the culture wars he has started in a four-chapter series: Welcome to the Revolution, The View From Within, Zero-Sum Game, and The Dog in the Room.

The only question is... why?  Why does Michael Vick need the wall to wall Favrian coverage?  The reasoning is simple - the Philadelphia Eagles are this year's it team and with Michael Vick still a lightning rod for debate and controversy, ESPN will attack this story like a bunch of rabid dogs.  ESPN going all-in with Vick and the Eagles is more of an entertainment decision than one that is actually about football.

Consider the "Dream Team" drama that surrounded Philly early this month.  We all got our knickers in a twist when it was said the Eagles wanted to be called the Dream Team, when in reality, it was one quote from backup QB Vince Young about the additions to the roster taken out of context.  But has that stopped ESPN from going all-in on the "Dream Team" narrative?  Of course not... even with the Eagles struggling in their preseason game against the Steelers.  Brian Kenny talked about the Dream Team possibly turning into a nightmare last night when referring to the Eagles.  Mike Greenberg did the same thing at the end of Mike & Mike today.  Schefter has continued to Tweet about the "Dream Team" after the story dropped.  It's all Eagles, all the time.  Rex Ryan is sooooo jealous.

I wonder this though... has ESPN gone all-in with the Eagles because of this planned Michael Vick issue?  It seems strange because Vick's comeback from prison has largely been laid to bed as many fans have forgotten/forgiven Vick and others will never truly accept him.  People largely know where they stand with Vick, so I was very surprised when I saw ESPN was devoting this much space to the Eagles QB.  However, ESPN worked throughout the Summer to put the Vick Issue together, so has the leader purposely been hyping Vick and the Eagles merely to sell more magazines?  Hmm...

The Vick issue is also cause for ESPN to take part in its favorite pasttime - cross promotional synergy!  They get to ride these Vick stories in the Mag and fill Mike & Mike, First Take, PTI, ESPNNEWS, Around The Horn, and others with Vick debate.  ESPN's programs will get to talk more about the team they have deemed to be the #1 story this season and if all else fails, they'll talk about the talk about the Eagles.  We've seen it with USC football and the Miami Heat before, but in truth, it's simply an entertainment decision (that makes a lot of fans angry).

Are the Eagles worth devoting eight times more attention to than any other team?  Of course not.  The NFL is far from a one team league, but building up someone like Philly into a superstar team, deserved or not, makes for more compelling stories (for better or worse).  It's like when the words "Dream Team" came out of Vince Young's mouth, ESPN finally saw something to do with the Heat Index during the NBA lockout - turn it into the Eagles Nest!  The last two Super Bowl champions, Green Bay and New Orleans, both reside in the NFC and are probably better teams... but don't let the actual football get in the way of ESPN's story du jour.

(Click read more for an unbelievable update on the story)

Screengrabs have become a hilarious and valuable part of the internet.  At any time, anyone on television can be captured in quite the uncompromising, uncomfortable, and comical poses.  This happened to John Clayton yesterday as he appeared to be in eiteher a zombie state, high, wasted, dead, or many other funny fill in the blank answers posted on our Twitter timeline.  For my money, I would say John looks Comfortably Numb...


Then again, Clayton could have been staring at his awesomely bizarre Twitter page for too long.  Yup, it still looks like this...



  no comments

From the MichiganZone comes this terrific video of George C. Scott reacting to possibly one of the worst segments in the HISTORY OF TELEVISION. It features a shameless advertisement and one of the most shameful television personalities being at his absolute worst. Personally, I'm amazed George C. Scott didn't lose it earlier and made it nearly 2 and a half minutes watching this awfulness unfold.

We despise Cowherd here at Awful Announcing, and apparently you do as well. In the reader voted tournament to replace Joe Morgan on our Mount Rushmore, Cowherd suffered a bitter defeat in an instant classic to Joe Buck after advancing all the way to the the Final Four. The dreadful consistency Cowherd has makes him a shoo-in to advance far if we ever need to replace anyone else on our Mount Rushmore.

[Michigan Zone]

Once you look past the actual severity of it all (and realize there were no serious injuries), the 5.8 magnitude earthquake that shook some of the east coast yesterday allowed for some laughs, and some groans.

However, Baltimore Ravens' rookie wide receiver Torrey Smith's reaction to the earthquake, while standing in the safest place imaginable filming a promo for his alma mater, had to be the best: 

Remind anyone else of 'The Burglars' skit from Jackass?

[H/T to SB Nation]

In the midst of what seems like a never-ending lockout, plenty of NBA players are making decisions as to what they will be doing in lieu of the next basketball season. While some are opting to go play elsewhere, others are electing a less traditional approach to the unwelcomed extended off-season. For example, Delonte West has applied for a job at Home Depot and Stephen Curry is going back to school. But the best lockout gig has to belong to Clippers' star Blake Griffin [via Sports Illustrated]: 

This week, the Los Angeles Clippers All-Star forward is interning at Funny Or Die, the comedy website co-founded by Ferrell and Adam McKay. Griffin arrived at the site's LA offices Tuesday to begin three days of work in video production.

He will help write, shoot, edit and act in several videos for the site. Funny Or Die quickly creates digital comedy videos, often with celebrity guest appearances.

"We're going to put him to work," said Mike Farah [president of production at Funny or Die]. "He's shooting a series of videos, and he's also coming to meetings. He's basically doing everything that an intern does."

This isn't Griffin's first crack at comedy, though (aside from embarrassing defenders by dunking over them, which provides comedic relief sometimes). At this year's ESPY's he and Kevin Love, amongst other NBA and NFL players, were featured in a faux-commercial -- a play off of the 1998 Grant Hill/Tim Duncan commercial -- advertising their services for odd jobs during the lockout: