Perhaps this can become a weekly feature at AA if enough sports networks would be willing to cooperate in comical graphics screw ups.  It's good for a few weekend laughs.  Earlier this week, we shared this graphic on Twitter thanks to a tip from Jeff Lowe.  When Cubs outfielder Kosuke Fukudome was being traded to the Cleveland Indians, Sports Time Ohio (local broadcaster of Indians games) got him slightly confused with Browns QB Jake Delhomme.  Thus creating the mythical, light hitting, interception throwing Kosuke Delhomme.  Then again, maybe a name change would be good for both...


Then if that wasn't enough, earlier today on SportsCenter, the leader ran a story on Ravens QB Joe Flacco wanting respect.  At least that's what it says in the sidebar.  Flacco is a good QB, so it seems like a decent profile idea, right?  Underrated QB searching for respect in the league and in the media.  Well, SportsCenter might want to spell someone's name correctly the next time they talk about that person's lack of respect.  Really though, it's not like Flacco is too hard to spell.  It's not Nnamdi Asomugha or anything and I think he may have either solved the debt crisis or found the Klopman Diamond according to media reports.  Via @Fettknowsbest and Jamison Hensley...


And in case you were wondering, John Clayton's Twitter page still looks like this...


That was your week in comical graphics screw ups.  Next time, be careful out there!

Yesterday, Jackson Strong - who has a top 10 best name ever btw, right up there with Max Power - made history by being the first to succesfully land a MotoX frontflip at the X-Games. 

Unfortunately, the announcer calling the action somehow mistook it for a some kind of historic record breaking BACKflip. That is, the kind of flip any MotoX rider worth his salt wouldn't be caught dead performing without the word "double" in front of it. The kind that was first nailed way back in 1993, 6 years before Tony Hawk put the X-Games on the map by sticking the 900. That is to say, the kind of flip that involves rotating the opposite direction, and is at this point completely pedestrian. Imagine if, when The Birdman finally nailed his white whale of skateboarding, the announcer had enthusiastically proclaimed, "TONY HAWK HAS JUST PERFORMED THE FIRST EVER 540!!" Kinda takes the wind out of your sails no?

Lucky for him nobody was watching. 

Updating our earlier story that Hard Knocks was unlikely to happen, today our inbox was greeted with the sad confirmation of the news.

"HBO Sports^® and NFL FILMS announced today that the five-episode Hard Knocks reality series will not be presented this summer.  The uncertainty of the NFL’s summer schedule and the incredibly expedited timetable this month made it impractical for a team to commit. The series is scheduled to return for 2012 training camp.

However, a special 90-minute edition of Hard Knocks, celebrating the past ten years of the seven-time Emmy®-Award-winning series will premiere Wednesday, Aug. 31 at 10:00 p.m. ET/PT, exclusively on HBO."

What a bummer. Our reaction below.




no comments

I don't have a lot of details on the following clip besides the fact that it stars Norwegian cycling announcers Christian Paasche and Johan Kaggestad, it was featured in Jimmy Traina's Hot Clicks today, and it is one of the funniest clips I've seen this week.   This fella Paasche truly is the Gus Johnson of cycling because his excitement and enthusiasm seems genuine.  Seriously, who could pretend to be this juiced for cycling?  (Get it, juiced, cycling, ahhh...)  Of course, the only foreign language experience I have is sleeping through a semester of French as a college student, so who am i to say for sure.  I do think there's an audible "high five" request though...



[Friday AM Hot Clicks]
 

Since moving to Los Angeles to co-host the 1.a.m ET SportsCenter, Neil Everett has slowly grown on me. After watching him consistently for the past two years, I recently became convinced that he should join John Anderson, Steve Levy and Rece Davis on my list of SportsCenter anchors that don’t make me want to blow my brains out.  Who’s on your SCATDMMWTBMBO list?

Unlike Chris Berman, Stuart Scott, Steve Berthiaume and Scott Van Pelt, Everett is a nice balance of personality and professionalism.  He rarely goes over the top with his catch phrases and typically keeps his composure.  He’s at his best when he’s doing highlights; I like his delivery, energy, improvisation and timing. The guy just always seems comfortable, regardless of what sport he’s doing highlights for. Not every anchor is capable of being at ease in every situation. You ever hear Linda Cohn do a soccer highlight? She’s like a camel trying to swim across the Atlantic.

For the most part, Everett does a good job, but every anchor has their issues.  To me, Everett’s biggest problem is that he sometimes gets too carried away with his writing. His scripts are a tad too wordy and his lead-ins are a smidge too cute. I also can’t stand those lame skits that he often takes part in, but something tells me those are his producer's ideas instead of his.

Anyway, last night, as Baseball Tonight was wrapping up, Everett popped on the tube with a tease for the upcoming SportsCenter.  I almost choked on my midnight snack after I saw Everett turn in a performance that the late  ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage would be proud of...

I understand that his adrenaline was probably pumping before the show and that he was trying to peak the interest of the audience, but there was no reason for Everett to scream and gyrate the way he did at the tail end of that tease.  Hopefully, someone in the control room got in his ear and told him how ridiculous his epileptic episode actually was.  The “X-GAMES ARE TAKING OVER!”  What the hell does that even mean?

Don’t let anything like this happen again Neil.  If you keep pulling the sort of garbage that I saw from you last night, you’ll be eliminated from my SCATDMMWTBMBO list.  There is no place on my list for an anchor that behaves like some roided out wrestler. Why do you think Berman never made the cut?

*Update: Today is the final day to vote in our Joe Morgan Memorial Tournament Final!!! Voting ends tonight at midnight, and as of right now, it looks like Cinderella Craig James has an insurmountable lead.  But, as we know, anything can happen!  So, stuff those ballot boxes between now and midnight and tell us who should join the three faces of awfulness currently on AA's Mt. Rushmore to replace Joe Morgan...Joe Buck or Craig James. And make sure you come back on Monday for the unveiling of our new and improved Awful Announcing banner!

 

Our month long Joe Morgan Memorial Tournament has reached the final.  Thanks to all of you who have taken part in the tournament so far, especially for the amazing 24,669 votes for the semifinals.  It's been an awesome month of awfulness here at AA, but it is now time to turn 32 into 1 and decide who will replace Joe Morgan on Awful Announcing's Mount Rushmore.  When we started this tournament July 5th, few people would have predicted ESPN college football analyst Craig James for one final slot.  However, a month of horrible PR came from nowhere for the Senator thanks to stunning revelations in the new Mike Leach book combined with the #FreeBruce saga.  Those stories lifted James to unprecedented heights of unlikability.  In the final he meets Fox play by play man Joe Buck, who in spite of winning some sympathy through battling a vocal cord virus, has rode a wave of years of discontent from sports fans through to the final.  Let's hope the final will be just as dramatic as the Colin Cowherd-Joe Buck semifinal, where Buck passed Cowherd in the final two minutes before the clock struck midnight and won by 33 votes out of 12,635.  Voting ends Friday night at Midnight on the East Coast.

The future of Awful Announcing's Mount Rushmore lies in your hands.  Who will join Pam Ward, Dick Vitale, and Tim McCarver in AA immortality?  Will it be Craig James or Joe Buck?


Craig James vs Joe Buck



Craig James

Fact File: ESPN college football game and studio analyst

Why He's Here: James became an integral part of one of college football's biggest stories when his son Adam's allegations of being locked in a closet led to Mike Leach's firing at Texas Tech.  This led to an awkward series of revelations made by Leach about Craig's meddling in his program, lawsuits, and other developments.  ESPN was put in the position of having one of their analysts be an integral part of the controversy.  How did Craig James respond?  Well, rumor has it he wants to be a Senator of course.  And now that his coverup and controversy briefly resulted in the "suspension" of respected CFB writer Bruce Feldman, James is more despised than ever.

Links:

The Mike Leach Book Excerpts Make Craig James Look Like An Even Bigger Douche
Craig James Wants You To Help Texans Help Save America
Announcer working Alamo Bowl gets Alamo Bowl coach suspended
Craig James running to the Senate
Craig James loses it

Round 1 Result: Defeated Mike Patrick  75.17% - 24.83%
Round 2 Result: Defeated Rick Reilly 66.32% - 33.68%
Round 3 Result: Defeated Stephen A. Smith 60.76% - 39.24%
Final 4 Result: Defeated Chris Berman 77.16% - 22.84% 

Joe Buck

Fact File: Fox's #1 play by play man for NFL and MLB.  Has announced several World Series and Super Bowls.

Why He's Here: Joe Buck has quickly risen to the top of the most disliked sports announcers.  His dry, monotone style doesn't quite fit in with an age where Gus Johnson and Kevin Harlan are two of the more popular sports announcers in the business.  Beyond that though, Joe Buck has a certain air of smugness towards his announcing duties, even admitting in the past that he isn't that big of a sports fan.  His attempted and failed late night career told sports fans that he had bigger and better things to do than announce the biggest games in sports.

Links:

Joe Buck Doesn't Enjoy Baseball Anymore
Real Tweets From Real People - Joe Buck
It's Time For Fox To Sit Joe Buck
The Artie Lange Interview

Round 1 Result: Defeated Chris Rose 72.53% - 27.47% 
Round 2 Result: Defeated Deion Sanders 55.21% - 44.79% 
Round 3 Result: Defeated Jim Gray 56.34% - 45.66%
Final 4 Result: Defeated Colin Cowherd 50.13% - 49.87%

Vote!



 

ESPN NBA analyst Jalen Rose was originally arrested for a DUI all the way back in March.  That arrest and the subsequent response from ESPN created some questions in the initial fallout.  Rose's mess has been lost in the shuffle over the last few months with the great NBA playoffs, subsequent lockout, and everything else going on in sports, but he was back in the news this week.  Rose was sentenced to 20 days in jail on Wednesday.  From the Detroit Free Press...

Judge Kimberly Small, known for her tough stance on drunken driving, ordered the former NBA player and University of Michigan basketball star to serve 93 days in jail, but she suspended all but 20 of those days.

Small, during a 40-minute sentencing hearing in 48th District Court in Bloomfield Township, told Rose: “You’re not here because you drank. I have no problem with that. Have at it. I do mind when you get behind the wheel of a two-ton vehicle and use it as a weapon against the rest of us.”

Now common sense would tell you that any sort of jail time for Jalen Rose would wake him up and make him be extra cautious on the roadways.  Going through that amount of public scrutiny and punishment should be enough to reflect on how careful one should be when driving.  However, in the words of Lee Corso, not so fast my friend.  You see, after he was sentenced to go to jail, Rose was almost immediately pulled over for speeding.  Again, the Free Press has the details...

Former Michigan Fab Fiver Jalen Rose was given a speeding ticket in Clawson hours after he was sentenced to nearly three weeks in jail for drunken driving, authorities said today.

Rose was clocked going 46 m.p.h. in a 25-m.p.h. zone shortly before 9 p.m. Wednesday night, Clawson Police Chief Harry Anderson said. He was given a citation for going at least 10 m.p.h. over the limit.

If that wasn't stupid enough, Rose then traded in his car for a scooter, straight up.  Can he not just hire a driver??  Seems like that would be safer for the rest of us.  With the jail sentence and all of the negative publicity that Rose has faced in the past year, it would not surprise me in the least to see the leader quietly part ways with the former Fab Fiver.  With the NBA lockout proving ex-jock analysts fairly useless, Jalen may fade away like those Fab Five banners.

We're thankful to @bubbaprog for letting us know AA got this mention below on Countdown with Keith Olbermann last night (no big deal)...

 

Olbermann reunited with his old partner in crime, Dan Patrick, to talk about what they expected in the movie version of the book, "Those Guys Have All The Fun."

While a lot of folks have had fun trying to cast the movie, I think the more interesting question is what portion of ESPN's history will the movie cover. Ryan took a stab at some possibilities which led to the Olbermann shout out. Dan Patrick commented that he's hearing the movie will focus on the mid 90's so it looks like the movie will be more focused on characters and individuals and not the uphill battle ESPN had to fight in its infancy to survive. 

How that book transitions into a movie is the million dollar question. If you've read the book, you can see the challenge at hand. Being a Hollywood expert having watched lots of movies and every episode of Entourage, here is how I'd do it (call my people so I can get EP credit).

The movie starts in 1987 and ends sometimes in 1994. 1987 is a good starting place because 2 of the 9 major steps in ESPN's rise happened that year. You can mention the buzz around the America's Cup coverage while management preps for the intense NFL bidding process. A narrator (Dan Patrick? Bob Ley?) can then guide you back to how other meetings could have caused ESPN to stumble early on. You can do quick flashbacks to the first 3 steps of ESPN's history which were all business orientated. In fact, with quick setups and cutaways you can even add some important steps like getting NCAA tournament games and Budweiser signing on as the first sponsor. Really, all of those stories just need a quick setup from a narrator and maybe 20 seconds in the flashback. You could cover a lot more ground going this route and add a lot of context.

I think the logical end point is 1994 with the start of the This Is SportsCenter commercials. The real meat of the movie outlines 2 main stories. 1) The business side where there were some very shrewd decisions but a revolving door of ownership and management. 2) John Walsh's impact on the company and the rising star of many of the ESPN personalities as well as the development of a frat house like culture.  Of course, Olbermann, Patrick, and the Big Show would play a central role.

The infamous launch party of ESPN2 would serve as the beginning of the end as the company culture has drifted a bit off course from it's scrappy and humble roots. From there you close out the movie with the various tensions between on air personalities and their managers and end the film with the "This Is Sportscenter commercials." For each commercial shoot you could add an epilogue for that individual and how their future with the company played out.

What are your thoughts on this approach? How would you go about not sacrificing cinematic ambition in favor of commercial appeal?

There may be no better follows on Twitter as a sports fan right now than the major NFL reporters.  Adam Schefter and Chris Mortensen of ESPN, Jay Glazer of Fox, Jason La Canfora of NFL Network, and even Pro Football Talk are always dishing out stories, news, and rumors, trying to beat the competition, especially during the mad rush of this past week.  The race for these reporters to get the story first is almost as interesting as the actual stories themselves, with Glazer tweeting a shot at his ESPN rivals yesterday.  

Well, in the midst of the craziest and shortest offseason in NFL history, ESPN's John Clayton finally got in the Twitter act yesterday.  One day and 71 Tweets later and Clayton has already amassed 134,000 followers faster than you can say Darren Roveil.  Something tells me that John still hasn't quite grasped the nuances of Twitter completely yet though.  Take a look at Clayton's Twitter page.  This is an actual picture as of 7:30 ET.


Wow.   At least it is an original background.  Clayton's Twitter account is just as newsworthy as the other top NFL reporters, but my word.  Is there not one intern in Bristol that can dress up his Twitter page just a little bit?  It gets better when you look at Clayton's profile on Tweetdeck.  Again, an actual screengrab...

Phenomenal.  This is probably way more funny to me than it really is, but I absolutely love this Twitter anomaly.  Then again, maybe the Professor is all outsmarting us and the small picture and graininess could just all be a reason to obscure us from seeing that famed pony tail...

Thanks to Chuck Anderson for the tip.
 

Sure, this has nothing to do with sports media, but who said we ever had to live within those rules all the time, right?  This version of Real Tweets From Real People was sparked by my 11,000th viewing of one of my all-time favorite movies, The Boondock Saints.  ("What were you gonna do, laugh the last three to death... FUNNY MAN?!")  The response last night on Twitter with your favorite rewatchable movie selections was awesome.  So why not dedicate Real Tweets to those favorite movies to start watching halfway through on cable or flip on Netflix when the sports options are running low.  And while you're at it, check out Ryan's movie doppelganger choices for the upcoming ESPN book movie project.  Don't worry, we're not turning into Grantland... yet.  After the jump and as always, these are Real Tweets From Real People...