It's truly a black day at Awful Announcing folks.  As SI.com's Richard Deitsch reports (catch his AA Q&A here and here) Matt Millen and Joe Theismann will be removed from the NFL Network's broadcast booth and replaced by Mike Mayock.  This news brings about a mixed bag of joy, fear, and maybe a little indigestion.  On one hand, fans of even borderline tolerable announcing should be ecstatic to finally have these two blockheads removed from game telecasts. No matter your opinion of Mike Mayock (personally, I feel he's overrated as a game analyst, but is superb in the studio), he can't have smaller shoes to fill than those left by Theismann and Millen -- perhaps the worst analyst pair in the history of sports on television. Unfortunately, that is more fact than exaggeration. Remember their bizarre canonization of Randy Moss last season?  Or this Pro Football Weekly article highlighting some of their "finer moments"?  

Time will tell if the No. 1 and No. 3 worst announcers, as voted by our AA readership, will inflict as large a path of announcing destruction without combining their forces in the NFLN booth.  But, while our ears will undoubtedly bleed less next fall, this rumored change at NFLN does mark a day of mourning for us here at AA. Just think of all the potential soundbytes, YouTube clips, and articles that are now lost without Millen and Theismann announcing together. No more Real Tweets from Real People, with such gems from the Twitterverse like the following:

RumfordJohnny If you harnessed the mental energy of Theismann and Millen, you could toast some bread...lightly.

j_cynic Matt Millen and Joe Theismann? Ugh. Even Joe Buck's ears bleed at that thought.

christiankwest Part of my brain oozed out of my ears after listening to that last Millen-Theismann exchange.#mutebutton

Heck, I was even considering pitching the idea to rename the Pammies the Theismanns, or the Millens...or the Millimanns.  But, at least Theismann and Millen will still be on the air plenty during football season on NFLN and ESPN, respectively, to make us laugh and cry simultaneously.  

By the way, Deitsch also mentions another ray of hope for the AA fan base and the NFLN broadcast booth.  The possibility that NFLN may reach out to Mr. Gus Johnson to fulfill the play-by-play duties starting next fall.  HA HA!  Even if it's only a rumor, we can still dream.

NFL Network adds Mike Mayock to coverage; Gus Johnson next? [Sports Illustrated]

Fans of the Kings and any NBA fans with neophobia gathered last night to say their final goodbyes to the Sacramento Kings, who are rumored to be moving to Anaheim for next season, if there is a next season.

The Kings wound up losing to the defending champion LA Lakers, but not before overcoming a 20-point deficit and forcing OT (well, Kobe forced OT, but the fact the game was extended was nonetheless fitting for a fanbase that didn't wind up leaving the arena until well after the final buzzer sounded).

I tuned in for the drama and found myself getting a little choked up over the fact yet another dedicated fanbase was likely seeing the last of its beloved NBA team. I always knew this to be the case, but I fully realized while watching it play out that if one of my teams (Detroit) were ever relocated out of the state, I'd 100-percent bawl like a baby missing its pacifier. I never watched the Shock dominate the WNBA -- I watched the clinching game of their first championship, actually -- and I was still legitimately and kind of inexplicably sad when they were moved to Tulsa. I can't imagine what it's like for Kings fans. To wit: I'll defer you to someone who can articulate it much better than I can, a great read from one of the best Kings writers I ever did read, Tom Ziller.

And, for relevance, here are Grant Napear and Jerry Reynolds, longtime Kings announcers (23 seasons and 25 seasons, respectively) saying their teary goodbyes as the crowd chants "GRANT AND JERRY!" in the background:

Sacramento Kings again show us heartbreak and loyalty, perhaps for the last time [SB Nation]

Folks, this is "Love Song":

H/T to Sammy!

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The Lewiston MAINEiacs broke a 1-1 tie with five seconds left in regulation of a Quebec Major Junior Hockey League second-round playoff series game over the weekend, causing their announcer to shriek mercilessly and nearly shatter all glass within five miles. It's not on the clip below, but after the call he told viewers it'd be really cool if they didn't tell anyone he screamed like that. (Okay, that's probably not true.)

Anyway, the announcer's name is D.J. Abisalih. He lives a pretty chill lifestyle, loves Sudoku, was an amazing street hockey goaltender, and has the dream to one day be the voice of the Boston Bruins. (That's actually all fact.)

Have a listen ... it gets exciting around the 25 second mark:

DJ gets a little excited about a Maineiacs goal [Pine Tree Pucks]

Courtesy of the outstanding Fang's Bites, we have the NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs announcing schedule for First Round games through April 24th for NBC & Versus.  Of course, the schedule with the later games in Round 1 is subject to change depending on which series will go longer.  It looks like the NHL is featuring glamour matchups like Blackhawks/Canucks, Rangers/Caps, Wings/Coyotes, and Bruins/Habs for the opening round.  Surprisingly, no sign on the telly of the Penguins as they take on the Lightning in Round 1, or Kings/Sharks and Ducks/Preds on the national TV schedule.

Wednesday April 13
Game 1: Phoenix @ Detroit, 7 pm, Versus - Mike Emrick, Darren Pang
Game 1: Chicago @ Vancouver, 10 pm, Versus - John Forslund, Brian Engblom

Thursday April 14
Game 1: Montreal @ Boston, 7 pm, Versus - Dave Strader, Darren Pang

Friday April 15
Game 2: New York Rangers @ Washington, 7:30 pm, Versus - Ken Daniels, Daryl Reaugh, Darren Eliot
Game 2: Chicago @ Vancouver, 10 pm, Versus - John Forslund, Brian Engblom

Saturday April 16
Game 2: Phoenix @ Detroit, 1 pm, NBC - Mike Emrick, Ed Olczyk, Darren Pang
Game 2: Montreal @ Boston, 7 pm, Versus - Dave Strader, Darren Eliot

Sunday April 17
Game 3: Washington @ New York Rangers, 3 pm, NBC - Mike Emrick, Ed Olczyk, Darren Pang
Game 3: Vancouver @ Chicago, 8 pm, Versus - Ken Daniels, Daryl Reaugh, Darren Eliot

Monday April 18
Game 3: Philadelphia @ Buffalo, 7 pm, Versus - Kenny Albert, Pierre McGuire
Game 3: Detroit @ Phoenix, 10:30 pm, Versus - John Forslund, Brian Engblom

Tuesday April 19
Game 4: Vancouver @ Chicago, 8 pm, Versus - Dave Strader, Daryl Reaugh, Darren Eliot

Wednesday April 20
Game 4: Washington @ New York Rangers, 7 pm, Versus - Mike Emrick, Darren Pang
Game 4: Detroit @ Phoenix, 10:30 pm, Versus - John Forslund, Brian Engblom

Thursday April 21
Game 4: Boston @ Montreal, 7 pm, Versus - Kenny Albert, Darren Pang

Friday April 22
Game 5: Phoenix @ Detroit, 7 pm, Versus - John Forslund, Brian Engblom

Saturday April 23
Game 5: New York Rangers @ Washington, 3 pm, NBC - Mike Emrick, Ed Olczyk, Darren Pang
Game 5: Montreal @ Boston, 7 pm, Versus - Dave Strader, Darren Pang

Sunday April 24
Game 6: Philadelphia @ Buffalo, 2 pm, NBC - Mike Emrick, Ed Olczyk, Darren Pang
Game 6: Vancouver @ Chicago, 7 pm, Versus - TBD, Darren Eliot
Game 6: Detroit @ Phoenix, 10:30 pm, Versus - John Forslund, Brian Engblom

Huge tip of the hat to Ken at Fang's Bites for the schedule!

Back in February, a very specific group of friends (you know who you are) each sent me the same bit of news.  Comedy Central had ordered 8 episodes of Sports Show with Norm MacDonald, which was then described as "part Daily Show, part Tosh.0 and part Onion SportsDome."  If you're a fan of Norm's, you might have fist pumped a little, knowing that 1) he'd be back on TV for you to laugh at and 2) he would be doing what he does best: reading the news.  Fast forward to April, when we started seeing Norm MacDonald's face on the late night circuit, hearing his 5 am slur on the Stern Show, and tonight, watching the series premiere. 

Now there are 2 types of people in this world, people who find Norm MacDonald hilarious, and those who don't.  It seems his "funny for being unfunny" act doesn't go over with everybody, and even though I have a VHS copy of Dirty Work at my parents' house, I get that.  But if you're in the "don'ts," let's get it straight right now - you're probably not going to like "Sports Show."  If you're a fan, you'll feel right at home from the first segment, which is pretty much a Weekend Update of the sportsworld, highlighted by Norm's repeated enunciation of the name "Charl Schwartzel."  After that, Norm had Blake Griffin help out with a taped bit in which the host himself barely appeared.



Clever workaround by the guy who said he was "right to be fired [from Saturday Night Live] because "I couldn't f****** act."  He took time to have some fun with Jim Nantz's historic putt calls and offered his opinions on Tiger Woods "lying down with ladies" in a segment called "What the H?" reminiscent of fellow Weekend Update Anchor Dennis Miller's HBO show in the 90s (which he worked on).  

All in all, the format is definitely designed to put Norm in his element, although I'd like to see some guests in future shows. Reading the news is how his awkward cadence and dry delivery just work, and Norm of course takes opportunities to throw out some jokes to remind us that after all, he's just a hilarious old hack at heart. 

“I’m excited and look forward to doing this series,” said Macdonald. “On this show, we plan to put the central back in COMEDY CENTRAL."

Actually, I'm surprised this kind of thing doesn't happen more often.  Pro athletes aren't exactly known for their discriminate tongues, but there are just certain words that you don't want to drop anywhere, no matter the circumstances... especially if it's in front of a national television audience and you're one of the most marketable, popular, and well-known athletes across the world.  Right, Kobe? (Warning, language here is pretty vulgar)



Ouch.  That wasn't pretty.  Reggie Miller chuckling at Kobe doesn't help the situation either.  Tiger Woods swears all the time on the golf course and gets away with it from the PGA Tour, but Kobe using a disgusting slur like this and being caught on TV seems worse.  Seeing as how it's Kobe and the Playoffs are imminent, I'll be shocked if he's suspended for swearing like Wayne Rooney was a week ago in the EPL.  But, seeing the vulgarity of this video makes me think the always image-conscious David Stern will want to do something, if only a slap on the wrist to make the story go away.

H/T The Last Angry Fan
 

IF there is a preseason before the NFL season next year, here are the games you'll be able to see on television.  The Bears and Rams will open up with the "hypothetical" Hall of Fame Game, and your MNF crew lead telecasts will be SEA-SD, NYJ-HOU, CHI-NYG and WAS-BAL.  Here are the rest of the games you won't be seeing this summer! 

Sunday, Aug. 7
-Hall of Fame Game - Chicago vs. St. Louis, at Canton, Ohio (NBC, 8 p.m.)

Week 1 (Aug. 11-15)
Thursday, Aug. 11 Seattle at San Diego (ESPN, 8pm)
Friday, Aug. 12 Tampa Bay at Kansas City (FOX, 8pm)
Monday, Aug. 15 N.Y. Jets at Houston (ESPN, 8pm)

Week 2 (Aug. 18-22)
Thursday, Aug. 18 Philadelphia at Pittsburgh  (FOX, 8pm)
Friday, Aug. 19 Atlanta at Jacksonville (FOX, 8pm)
Monday, Aug. 22 Chicago at N.Y. Giants (ESPN, 8pm)

Week 3 (Aug. 25-28)
Thursday, Aug. 25 Washington at Baltimore (ESPN, 8pm)
Friday, Aug. 26 Green Bay at Indianapolis (CBS, 8pm)
Saturday, Aug. 27 New England at Detroit (CBS, 8pm)
Sunday, Aug. 28 New Orleans at Oakland (NBC, 8pm)

Michael Pineda is one of the hottest young prospects in baseball.  The Dominican pitcher for the Seattle Mariners was the subject of a Baseball Tonight segment featuring ESPN analyst Eduardo Perez.  Pineda is a possible Rookie of the Year candidate and Eduardo was attempting to talk about the 6'7" Pineda standing on top of the 10 inch mound, and being an imposing 7'5" presence.  Except, that didn't quite happen very smoothly...



That was a very nice awkward pause involving Pineda's "ten inch uhhh."  Needless to say, I think this clip is much more memorable with the awkward silence and uncomfortable innuendo than the thousands of other forgettable Baseball Tonight segments that will run this year.  Don't worry though, I'll spare you more jokes about Pineda's impressive tools or hard stuff.

H/T HyperVocal

Today we present Part II of our interview with Richard Deitsch of Sports Illustrated.  In case you missed Part I yesterday that talked primarily about NCAA Tournament coverage, you can catch it here.  In today's second part, Richard talks to AA about several topics ranging from the young baseball season to the Poynter Institute to which announcer has caught his eye thus far this year.

___________________________________________________________________________

Q: MLB season is just getting underway.  What do you make of ESPN's shakeup to the Sunday Night booth and will Fox do anything to liven up their coverage, which has seemed stale for years?

A: For those of us tortured for decades by the serial grump Joe Morgan, this year represents the sweet taste of freedom.  I'm not sure I love Bobby Valentine or Orel Hershiser but it matters not: Joe Morgan is gone, and life is good again.  I’ve long been a huge admirer of Shulman's and have written that for close to a decade. I appreciate ESPN executives finally catching up with me.

I’m not as down on Fox’s coverage as many sports bloggers seem to be.  I get the reason why people don’t like Tim McCarver - they think he’s arrogant, moralizing etc… but I’ve long respected McCarver for speaking his mind, damn the consequences.  Fox’s history of poor talent choices on its non-NFL pregame shows would take up a couple of graphs and my fingers are tired.

Q: ESPN is touting a more transparent relationship with fans through the new PR blog and ombudsman. Has their effort done enough thus far?

A: It's far too early to give a grade on the transparency of the blog but I think those that are expecting ESPN Front Row to offer self-analysis of why the network made certain editorial decisions should look elsewhere.  The blog is well done.  Great design.  Sharply edited.  But so far its charter has been to highlight some deserving behind-the-scenes players who don't get nearly enough credit publicly.  I think it will be a huge hit for employees in the same way people love seeing their name in the hometown paper.  The addition of Poynter as ESPN’s watchdog gives me hope for the moment.  I thought Kelly McBride's second column was one of the best pieces I've read from an ESPN watchdog.  As I've said for years, if ESPN wanted readers and viewers to take the ombudsmen efforts seriously, there needed to be a mechanism for the ombudsman to react somewhat in real time.  McBride did that, and props to her.  Will ESPN implement suggestions from Poynter?  Only time will tell.

Q: You've been very hard on Colin Cowherd, as have we.  With his history of inflammatory comments, etc, why does he still have a job?

A: I have mixed feelings on Cowherd.  There are not many people who can carry a daily national sports-talk show and he can certainly do that.  As I've written, I appreciate that he's been generous with Michele Beadle, and it’s helped her get comfortable on SportsNation.  I also hear from plenty of staffers that he's a decent guy away from the mic.

My major problem with Cowherd is that no national sports-talk figure offers more generalizations on more topics, and too often his generalizations are not factual, and at worst, reckless.  His comments on John Wall were reprehensible and that no one at ESPN uttered any kind of objection spoke volumes.  Cowherd has a job because his company considers him a valuable commodity.  He's on a ton of affiliates and he produces an entertaining show for many people.  I don't advocate ESPN pulling him at all.  I just wish there were someone in-house who was courageous enough to publicly say that the guy is full of bleep when the guy is full of bleep.

Q: Your media awards column ends with broadcasters we should see more of and ones we should see less. Who's one announcer that has stood out for you so far this year as on the rise, and one who needs to ride off into the sunset?

A: It's counterintuitive but I think Hubie Brown continues to get better with age.  He's prepared, never talks down to his audience, and has the gravitas of being in the arena.  He's had an excellent year.  No one bludgeons a telecast like Joe Theismann.  I've said it a thousand times before: If you are going to employ Theismann, he must only be in the studio.  Viewers simply do not like him as game analyst.  But in the words of David Byrne: Same as it ever was.

Q: If you were starting a new sports channel withan unlimited budget and could hire any 5 TV sportspersonalities, who would they be and why?

A: First, I'd hire a great executive producer long before any on-air talent.  Get me a creative thinker, a visionary, someone who understands how great television is produced, and then we'll figure out how to develop on-air talent.  I'd also need to know what sport the channel is primarily focused on.  That said, I'll give you a starting five, even though there are hundreds of terrific on-air people.  Bob Costas, Dan Shulman, Mary Carillo, Al Michaels and Mike Mayock.


Big thanks to Richard for taking the time to talk with us and answer our questions.  Hope you enjoyed our two-part Q&A.  You can catch Richard's writings on SI.com (his latest media column is here) and in the magazine.  Also follow Richard on Twitter for great links and insights.